And so my journey begins

It looked good on paper, sounded even better in my mind. Applying my self to something new to help combat depression. One day into it and I'm already about to give up. I cant find a way to get things organized enough I can function. So in return the feelings of stress and headaches begin to erupt. Each second ticking by I feel as if I am trapped inside my own body. I want to come out of my shell so to speak, but yet I just cant seem to dig my way out. I look back at my kids's lives and realize just how much I have missed with them. Not that I wasn't there for the special milestone moments but I just didn't see them the way I should have. I have also noticed things changed when my son received the diagnosis of autism. Though he is high functioning, there are still the daily problems that occur with it. I wish just for one minute that I could see the world through his mind, then maybe i could now how to help him more. I know though in order to help him, I need to first help me... that may mean conquering my fears and talking to a doctor, that may mean finding away to focus on being happy again however the method I will find a way to do it. For my family so I can be the girl HE created me to be.